Playing Every TMNT Character - Retro TMNT

Welcome Back to Undefeated at Locals! Thanks for joining me for another week of Playing Every TMNT Character! This time I am here to discuss the Retro Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles from the Starter Deck. I wasn’t planning on playing these guys as they are not remotely designed to be anywhere near playable but my good buddy Magnus from Coping with Cardboard said I had to so here we are. Again, if you aren’t reading and/or watching Coping with Cardboard’s content YOU SHOULD BE! Check them out here: https://www.copingwithcardboard.com/ and here: https://www.youtube.com/@CopingWithCardboard

So, I didn’t go into this looking for “The Best” build, I wanted to play fun cards and as many of the retro art cards as possible in a very pointless character. The deck was built on the Good symbol simply to have access to Toughest Punk in Junior High, Nice Try, and High Value Target all to help me survive my opponents turns to maybe get a chance to crack back. The main goal of the attacks is to play High Three to make Setting the standards a 6/6 and then Setting makes Martial Arts Moves a 4/4, saving the Rising Uppercuts to hit them on their turn. This kind of worked OK occasionally but not really. I am not going to go too in depth with my matches since there is not much to be said about how to win with a 22 health, 6 hander with almost no abilities. The absolute best part about playing this character is finding out that the exact day I played this in WcW was the 38th anniversary of the premier of the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles animated series and that, as well as my opponents that night made the entire deck worth it!

Round 1 I got exactly what I wanted and paired into Magnus and his Erwin Smith 13th Commander build and this could not have gone any better. Game 1 was an absolute blowout in his favor after he destroyed his entire board to hit me with a massive Erwins Final Charge. Game 2 I got to string out pretty well and was actually able to deal the 23-damage required to take a game, something I did not expect to happen all night. This game took forever to complete so we ended in a draw with a future match to be fought at a later date but with me playing the 4 Hander TMNT instead of this starter deck filler character.

Round 2 was against my friend and teammate Steven and his crazy aggressive Rodan, Giant Monster of the Sky deck. These games went VERY fast and entirely in his favor. I think I was able to hit him with 1-2 Rising Uppercuts on his turns across 2 games but everything else I threw out was blocked. It ended 0-2 as I expected.

In the 3rd and final round, I fought Kyle Goguen and his insanely cool Toru Hagakure (II) deck that he sent me to the moon with. In game 1 I was able to land a few attacks but couldn’t quite get there before being obliterated on his turn. In our second game Canister Creation Strike hit me for almost my health total before he was done. I again lost this round 0-2.

I did not expect to win even a single match so that was a big surprise, The deck was overall fun enough, but this is mostly due to the fact I had 3 VERY fun opponents that made up for the lack of a character I had available. I truly wish UVS Games would make these starter characters just a tiny bit better but more on my thoughts there in a future article! My list is as always, below if you find yourself wanting to suffer through this character for some reason. Thanks again Magnus for making me do this, I guess!

https://uvsultra.online/deck.php?deck=RSpyPsbqnyXyHfZdTuRWjBrtBOchfu